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I was having a chat with Nobilis, and he asked me that question. It seems like a simple question but it hit me hard and I wondered about it immediately. When I started blogging over 3 years ago I had many reasons - excitement, exhibitionism, and a big dose of validation.

Yep, I said it, I was looking for validation. It wasn’t a grand feminist act or a social experiment. I was a girl with a Bachelor’s degree, a 2.1 megapixel digital camera, and a long-distance boyfriend. He was the only lover I had ever had and I wanted the approval of others. I was, in the most neutral but honest sense of the phrase, an attention whore.

I still am.

Sure, I might go weeks where I only blog about blogging. Where I don’t intentionally try to titilate. Where no naked pictures, desperate for glowing praise surface, but I still meet the requirement. My boyfriend lives in the house now, I have had new lovers, and my cell phone takes better pics than my old camera did. I’m still an attention whore.

The frightening thing is that, like a junkie, it takes more to get a fix. I’m not impressed by “Ur hot”, now I want to hear “You’re smart”. And I do hear it, every day. Not just from the bloggers up above, but the random reader, even my clients. The feedback means the world to me but it also doesn’t mean a thing.

Writing is a process, not a product. I feel like if I learn something from writing, then it has been worthwhile. The ability to instruct others is just a really fabulous bonus. It builds a community that I am so proud to be part of.

So, what about that question in the title? The cop-out is to say that I try to be both. I won’t lie and say “I do what I do, and if you are turned on that is your business”. Of course I sometimes aim to titilate. I also aim to make people think. And here is the trick with me - thinking *is* sexy. I’m not content to rest on my laurels knowing that my cleavage or the story of what I did last night got someone hard/wet. By my standards, I’ve only been a sexy blogger if I pushed a tiny boundary in your brain.

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